TED Series, Part I: Could Creatine Play an Important Role to Mental Health?

In this first instalment of the TED (Tired-Exercise-Diet) series, we will explore the intriguing possibility that creatine supplementation, long associated with sports performance, might also play a role in mental health, especially in disorders rooted in shame, self-hate, self-criticism, and general affect dysregulation.

Introducing TED in the NeuroAffective-CBT® Framework – Mirea’s Contribution

The TED model (Tired-Exercise-Diet) synthesises insights from neuroscience (e.g., gut–brain signalling, reward pathways), nutritional psychiatry, psychophysiology (e.g., sleep deprivation), and behavioural science (habit formation, conditioning). By organising these findings into three core domains, sleep, exercise, and diet, TED provides an accessible, flexible, and evidence-informed structure for lifestyle-oriented intervention.

But TED is not just theoretical: it is publicly presented and described by Daniel Mirea in the NeuroAffective-CBT® literature. Mirea’s “Tired, Exercise and Diet Your Way Out of Trouble” (TED model) is available via ResearchGate, Academia, and the NA-CBT site as a leaflet and white-paper introduction to emotional regulation through lifestyle (Mirea, 2023). In his description, the TED module is positioned centrally within the NA-CBT method, linking body, brain, and affect, the Body–Brain–Affect triangle (Mirea, 2025).

Within the larger NeuroAffective-CBT® programme (comprising six modules), TED is introduced early, immediately after assessment and conceptualisation. NA-CBT specifically targets shame-based disorders such as self-loathing, self-disgust, and low self-esteem, which often underpin psychopathologies like major depressive disorder and anorexia (Mirea, 2023). Addressing lifestyle factors may augment traditional CBT approaches (Firth et al., 2020; Lopresti, 2019).

Empirical evidence shows that improving sleep, increasing physical activity, and enhancing diet quality yield synergistic benefits for emotional regulation, reduction of maladaptive cravings, and improvement of self-esteem (Kandola et al., 2019; Irwin, 2015).

For clinicians, TED offers a concrete tool: integrate lifestyle domains early, personalise interventions, and use TED to amplify CBT. For researchers, it highlights testable mechanisms and opportunities for controlled trials.

This first part focuses on a lesser-known nutritional agent now attracting neuroscientific attention: creatine, a compound with emerging evidence linking it to neuroenergetics and mental health (Candow et al., 2022; Allen et al., 2024).

Why Creatine? What the Evidence Suggests (and Doesn’t..)

The Rationale: Bioenergetics, Oxidative Stress, and Brain Demand

Creatine helps the body make and recycle energy quickly. It acts like a backup battery for your cells, keeping them charged when energy demand is high. While we often think of creatine as something that helps muscles perform better, the brain also uses a huge amount of energy, about one-fifth of everything the body burns at rest.

In people experiencing depression or anxiety, studies suggest that the brain’s mitochondria (the cell’s “power stations” that turn food into usable energy) often don’t work as efficiently. This can lead to higher levels of oxidative stressa kind of cellular “wear and tear” caused by unstable oxygen molecules that damage cells over time (Morris et al., 2017).

Taking creatine as a supplement may help the brain’s mitochondria work more efficiently, reduce oxidative stress, and stabilise the brain’s energy balance (Allen et al., 2024). Animal studies show that creatine can reduce stress in brain cells and even decrease depression-like behaviours (Zhang et al., 2023). Research in humans is still early, but the results so far are promising.


💡 In simple TED terms:
Why Creatine Might Help the Brain: Energy and Stress Balance! Creatine may help the brain produce cleaner, steadier energy, while reducing the internal “rust” that builds up from stress and poor metabolism, both of which are key targets in emotional regulation.

Human Evidence: Mood, Cognition, and Stress Conditions

Mood and Depression

Early studies suggest that creatine may help boost the effects of antidepressant medication. In one carefully controlled trial, women who took 5 grams of creatine monohydrate per day alongside their usual SSRI antidepressant showed faster and stronger improvements in mood than those taking a placebo (Lyoo et al., 2012).

Several reviews of this research confirm that creatine seems most effective as an add-on rather than a stand-alone treatment (Allen et al., 2024; L-Kiaux et al., 2024). In other words, creatine may make existing treatments work better, but it is not yet proven to work on its own.

Although there have been no large human trials testing creatine by itself for depression or PTSD, brain-imaging studies show that creatine supplementation increases the brain’s phosphocreatine levels (the stored form of cellular energy). This may help restore low brain-energy levels often found in people with mood disorders (Dechent et al., 1999; Rae & Bröer, 2015).

💡 TED translation: Creatine may act like an energy booster for the brain, helping antidepressants “catch” faster and work more effectively. Within the TED framework, this fits the Diet domain, using nutrition to support energy stability and emotional regulation and, complements therapeutic work in the Affect domain.

Cognition, Memory, and Sleep Deprivation

Research also shows that creatine can help the brain think and react more effectively, especially when it is under pressure. Systematic reviews indicate that creatine can enhance memory, focus, and processing speed in conditions of metabolic stress, such as sleep deprivation, oxygen deprivation, or prolonged mental effort (Avgerinos et al., 2018; McMorris et al., 2017).

In one notable experiment, people who stayed awake all night performed better on reaction-time tasks and reported less mental fatigue after taking creatine (McMorris et al., 2006). These benefits appear strongest in older adults or individuals whose brains are already energy-challenged, for example, due to stress, ageing, or poor sleep (Dolan et al., 2018). In contrast, young, well-rested participants often show little or no change (Simpson & Rawson, 2021).

💡 TED translation: Creatine seems to protect the brain when energy is low during exhaustion, stress, or lack of sleep. This is what we call a reactive emtional state (reactive amygdala). It doesn’t make a healthy, rested brain “smarter,” but it helps a tired brain function more efficiently. In TED terms, it bridges the Tired and Diet domains: improving sleep quality indirectly and supporting cognitive endurance under pressure.

Key Questions & Considerations

Dose, Duration, and Uptake

A few muscle studies, led by Dr. Darren Candow, show that taking 3–5 grams of creatine monohydrate per day is enough to maintain muscle levels once stores are full. To load the system faster, some use about 20 grams per day for 5–7 days, which quickly saturates muscle tissue (Candow et al., 2022; Kreider et al., 2017).

However, the brain takes longer to absorb creatine. Imaging studies suggest that at least 10 grams per day for several weeks may be needed to raise brain levels meaningfully (Dechent et al., 1999; Rae & Bröer, 2015). Because around 95% of the body’s creatine is stored in muscle, the brain receives its share more slowly, which may explain why mood or cognitive effects sometimes take weeks to appear.

💡 TED translation: Creatine needs time to “charge the system”. Like building savings in a bank, the longer and more consistently you invest, the better the returns. Within TED, this reflects the Tired and Diet domains, combining steady supplementation with sleep and nutrition for sustained brain energy.

Sodium and Electrolyte Co-Ingestion

Creatine is carried into cells by a sodium-chloride transporter (called SLC6A8) (Tachikawa et al., 2013). This means that electrolytes, especially sodium, help creatine get where it needs to go. While not yet proven for brain outcomes, pairing creatine with a small amount of electrolyte water or a balanced meal containing sodium may improve absorption.

💡 TED translation: Think of sodium as a helper molecule, like a key that lets creatine into the cell. In TED language, this links Diet with Physiology: hydration, electrolytes, and nutrition work together to optimise energy flow.

Dietary Status

People who eat little or no animal protein, such as vegetarians or vegans, often start with lower creatine stores and therefore show a greater response to supplementation (Candow et al., 2022; Antonio et al., 2021). Interestingly, brain creatine levels appear to stay relatively stable across diet types, which suggests the brain has its own built-in regulation system (Rae & Bröer, 2015).

💡 TED translation: Your baseline diet changes how quickly you benefit from creatine. If you avoid animal foods, your muscles may “fill up” faster when you supplement but the brain keeps itself balanced. This reflects TED’s Diet principle: individualisation matters.

Safety and Misconceptions

Decades of studies confirm that creatine monohydrate is safe for healthy adults. No evidence links standard doses (3–5 g/day) to kidney or liver problems (Kreider et al., 2017; Harvard Health Publishing, 2024). Increases in serum creatinine after supplementation simply reflect higher turnover, not kidney damage.

The often-mentioned hair-loss claim remains unsupported (Antonio et al., 2021). However, clinicians should note that in rare cases, individuals with bipolar disorder have reported manic switching after starting creatine (Silva et al., 2013). These cases are very uncommon but worth monitoring in sensitive populations.

💡 TED translation: Creatine is one of the safest, best-studied supplements in both sport and health science. Still, as with all lifestyle tools, TED encourages personalisation and medical oversight, particularly in those with complex mental-health or metabolic conditions.

Implications for TED and NeuroAffective-CBT®

In clinical settings, creatine can and should be viewed as a supportive tool rather than a replacement for established therapies. The goal is to use it thoughtfully in context, and always alongside medical supervision.

Practical guidelines:

  • Screen and personalise: Assess kidney function, diet, and medication interactions before supplementation.
  • Adjunctive use: Creatine should complement, not replace, therapy or pharmacological treatment.
  • Dosing: A short “loading” phase of 20 g/day for 5–7 days, or a gradual increase of 10–20 g/day over four weeks, can be followed by 3–5 g/day for maintenance (Candow et al., 2022).
  • Timing: Best used during periods of sleep loss, cognitive strain, or emotional exhaustion, when the brain’s energy demands are high.
  • Integration: Combine with other TED domains, sleep hygiene, structured exercise, and nutrient-dense diet to amplify benefits (Firth et al., 2020).
  • Monitor and document: Track mood, focus, and physical function; adapt dosing empirically and contribute data to practice-based research.

💡 TED translation: Creatine fits naturally within the Tired–Exercise–Diet framework as a metabolic support for emotional regulation. TED encourages clinicians to see it not as a “pill for a problem,” but as part of a whole-lifestyle system, where sleep, movement, and nutrition all reinforce psychological recovery.


Summary & Outlook

  • The TED model (sleep, exercise, diet) offers a practical bridge between psychotherapy and lifestyle science, especially for conditions rooted in shame, self-criticism, and affect dysregulation (Firth et al., 2020; Lopresti, 2019).
  • Creatine demonstrates strong scientific plausibility and early clinical promise for improving mood, cognition, and resilience under metabolic stress (Allen et al., 2024; Candow et al., 2022).
  • The next step for researchers is to conduct large, placebo-controlled clinical trials testing creatine as an adjunct to CBT for depression and anxiety — ideally with neuroimaging to confirm its effects on brain energy metabolism.

💡 TED translation: Creatine may one day become a recognised “nutritional ally” for the brain, enhancing therapy outcomes by helping clients feel less tired, more focused, and more emotionally stable. For now, it serves as a valuable prototype of how lifestyle science can empower both clinicians and clients to target emotional health from the body upward.

⚠️ Disclaimer:
A final and important reminder: these articles are not intended to replace professional medical or psychological assessment and/or treatment. Regular blood tests and health check-ups with your GP or a private family doctor are essential throughout adult life, in fact increasingly relevant from adolescence onward, given the rising incidence of metabolic and endocrine conditions such as diabetes among young people. It is strongly recommended to seek guidance from qualified professionals, for example, a GP, clinical psychologist, a psychiatrist or depending on your personal goals and needs a registered nutritionist, indeed a NeuroAffective-CBT® therapist, who can interpret your health data (including blood work) and help you understand how your lifestyle, daily habits, and nutritional choices influence your mental and emotional wellbeing.

🧾References:

Allen, P.J., D’Anci, K.E. & Kanarek, R.B., 2024. Creatine supplementation in depression: bioenergetic mechanisms and clinical prospects. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 158, 105308. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neubiorev.2024.105308

Antonio, J. et al., 2021. Common questions and misconceptions about creatine supplementation: what does the scientific evidence really show? Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition, 18(1), 13–27. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12970-021-00412-z

Avgerinos, K.I., Spyrou, N., Bougioukas, K.I. & Kapogiannis, D., 2018. Effects of creatine supplementation on cognitive function of healthy individuals: a systematic review of randomized controlled trials. Experimental Gerontology, 108, 166–173. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.exger.2018.04.014

Braissant, O., 2012. Creatine and guanidinoacetate transport at the blood–brain and blood–cerebrospinal-fluid barriers. Journal of Inherited Metabolic Disease, 35(4), 655–664. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10545-011-9415-6

Candow, D.G., Forbes, S.C., Chiang, E., Farthing, J.P. & Johnson, P., 2022. Creatine supplementation and aging: physiological responses, safety, and potential benefits. Nutrients, 14(6), 1218. https://doi.org/10.3390/nu14061218

Dechent, P., Pouwels, P.J.W., Wilken, B., Hanefeld, F. & Frahm, J., 1999. Increase of total creatine in human brain after oral supplementation of creatine monohydrate. American Journal of Physiology – Regulatory, Integrative and Comparative Physiology, 277(3), R698–R704. https://doi.org/10.1152/ajpregu.1999.277.3.R698

Dolan, E., Gualano, B., Rawson, E.S. & Phillips, S.M., 2018. Creatine supplementation and brain function: a systematic review. Psychopharmacology, 235, 2275–2287. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00213-018-4956-2

Firth, J. et al., 2020. A meta-review of “lifestyle psychiatry”: the role of exercise, smoking, diet and sleep in mental disorders. World Psychiatry, 19(3), 360–380. https://doi.org/10.1002/wps.20773

Harvard Health Publishing, 2024. What is creatine? Harvard Medical School. Available at: https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/what-is-creatine

Irwin, M.R., 2015. Why sleep is important for health: a psychoneuroimmunology perspective. Annual Review of Psychology, 66, 143–172. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-010213-115205

Kandola, A., Ashdown-Franks, G., Hendrikse, J., Sabiston, C.M. & Stubbs, B., 2019. Physical activity and depression: toward understanding the antidepressant mechanisms of physical activity. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 107, 525–539. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neubiorev.2019.09.040

Kreider, R.B. et al., 2017. ISSN position stand: safety and efficacy of creatine supplementation in exercise, sport, and medicine. Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition, 14, 18. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12970-017-0173-z

L-Kiaux, A., Brachet, P. & Gilloteaux, J., 2024. Creatine for the treatment of depression: preclinical and clinical evidence. Current Neuropharmacology, 22(4), 450–466. https://doi.org/10.2174/1570159X22666230314101523

Lopresti, A.L., 2019. A review of lifestyle factors that contribute to important pathways in depression: diet, sleep and exercise. Journal of Affective Disorders, 256, 38–44. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2019.05.066

Lyoo, I.K. et al., 2012. A randomized, double-blind clinical trial of creatine monohydrate augmentation for major depressive disorder in women. American

Journal of Psychiatry, 169(9), 937–945. https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.2012.11081259

McMorris, T. et al., 2006. Creatine supplementation and cognitive performance during sleep deprivation. Psychopharmacology, 185(1), 93–103. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00213-005-0269-8

McMorris, T., Harris, R.C., Howard, A. & Jones, M., 2017. Creatine, sleep deprivation, oxygen deprivation and cognition: a review. Journal of Sports Sciences, 35(1), 1–8. https://doi.org/10.1080/02640414.2016.1156723

Mirea, D., 2023. Tired, Exercise and Diet Your Way Out of Trouble (T.E.D.) model. NeuroAffective-CBT® Publication. Available at: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/382274002_Tired_Exercise_and_Diet_Your_Way_Out_of_Trouble_T_E_D_model_by_Mirea [Accessed 17 October 2025]

Mirea, D., 2025. Why your brain makes you crave certain foods (and how “TED” can help you rewire it…). NeuroAffective-CBT, 17 September. [online] Available at: https://neuroaffectivecbt.com/2025/09/17/why-your-brain-makes-you-crave-certain-foods/ [Accessed 17 October 2025].

Morris, G., Berk, M., Carvalho, A.F. et al., 2017. The role of mitochondria in mood disorders: from pathophysiology to novel therapeutics. Bipolar Disorders, 19(7), 577–596. https://doi.org/10.1111/bdi.12534

Rae, C. & Bröer, S., 2015. Creatine as a booster for human brain function. Neurochemistry International, 89, 249–259. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuint.2015.07.009

Silva, R. et al., 2013. Mania induced by creatine supplementation in bipolar disorder: case report. Journal of Clinical Psychopharmacology, 33(5), 719–721. https://doi.org/10.1097/JCP.0b013e3182a60792

Simpson, E.J. & Rawson, E.S., 2021. Creatine supplementation and cognitive performance: a critical appraisal. Nutrients, 13(5), 1505. https://doi.org/10.3390/nu13051505

Tachikawa, M., Fukaya, M., Terasaki, T. & Ohtsuki, S., 2013. Distinct cellular expression of creatine transporter (SLC6A8) in mouse brain. Journal of Cerebral Blood Flow & Metabolism, 33(5), 836–845. https://doi.org/10.1038/jcbfm.2013.6

Zhang, Y., Li, X., Chen, S. & Wang, J., 2023. Creatine and brain health: mechanisms and therapeutic prospects. Frontiers in Neuroscience, 17, 1176542. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnins.2023.1176542

Why Your Brain Makes You Crave Certain Foods

and How ‘TED’ can Help You Rewire It…

Why do some foods feel irresistible, while others barely tempt you? It is tempting to think cravings are just about taste, sweet, salty, sour, bitter, but the truth runs much deeper. Your brain and gut are in constant conversation, sending signals that shape not only what you like to eat, but what you want to eat again and again. But here’s the twist: those preferences aren’t fixed! With the right strategies, you can actually retrain your brain to crave healthier foods. One of the most practical tools for doing this is ‘TED‘ short for Tired, Exercise, Diet. Within the NeuroAffective-CBT approach, TED is one of the most compelling self-regulation frameworks. It uses the idea of an ‘imaginal friend‘, a life-coach or inner guide that can help you stay focused on daily choices which support meaningful lifestyle changes. These changes strengthen both physical health and immunity while also building psychological resilience, self-appreciation, and self-love.

Each component of TED – Tiredness (sleep), Exercise, and Diet, has strong empirical links to emotional and cognitive wellbeing. First introduced to the psychotherapy world nearly 20 years ago by behaviourist Daniel Mirea (Mirea, 2023), TED has become a cornerstone of the NA-CBT approach. At its core, TED highlights the Body–Brain–Affect triangle, showing how rest, movement, and nutrition work together to regulate cravings, balance mood, and improve overall health.

So, let’s think of TED as your inner coach and personal trainer, totally on your side but tough and fair, a voice you can hear all the time:

  • Tired → how well you rest shapes hunger, hormones, and food choices.
  • Exercise → physical activity resets dopamine and balances stress.
  • Diet → what you eat trains your gut and brain to prefer certain foods.

And now… with TED in mind, let’s examine how cravings really work and how to rewire them.

The Three Layers of Food Preference

Scientists generally point to three systems that explain why we like certain foods:

1. Taste Buds (Diet in Action)

The tongue is the first gatekeeper of food preference. It detects sweet, salty, sour, bitter and, umami (savory, meaty flavour), behaviourally guiding us toward energy-rich or protein-rich foods. This happens because specialised neurons on the tongue can detect sweetness, saltiness, sourness, bitterness, and umami. They give us that instant “yum” or “yuck”. But taste alone isn’t the full story. What you repeatedly eat conditions your taste buds. A diet heavy in ultra-processed foods can dull sensitivity to natural flavors, while a shift to whole foods can make simple tastes more rewarding within 7–14 days (Wise, P. et al., 2016; Turner S et al., 2022).

👉 What does TED say? This is where D for Diet comes in: by choosing nourishing foods consistently, you retrain both your taste buds and your reward circuits. But also, E for Exercise: by changing habits and replacing eating with exercise rewiring occurs even faster and the brain is much more likely to ‘demand and accept’ protein-based products useful for muscle development.


2. Gut–Brain Signaling (The Sleep & Diet Link)

As food travels down the digestive tract, neurons detect its texture, temperature, and nutrients. Specialised “neuropod cells” are tuned to sense amino acids, sugars, and fats. These cells send electrical signals through the nodose ganglion straight into the brain, triggering dopamine, the neurotransmitter of motivation and reward Bohórquez et al., 2015. In other words, when sugar, fat, or amino acids hit the gut, they trigger dopamine release, shaping cravings at a subconscious level.

And here’s the worse news: poor sleep (The T from TED – Tired) makes these signals even stronger. Lack of rest ramps up ghrelin (the hunger hormone) and dampens leptin (the satiety hormone), pushing you toward high-calorie foods. At the same time, a diet rich in fiber, protein, and complex carbs strengthens gut–brain communication in healthier ways.

👉 TED takeaway: better sleep and diet quality work hand in hand to keep cravings in check.


3. Learned Associations (Exercise as a Reset Button)

The brain is able to link the flavour of food with its aftereffects, like blood sugar rise and dopamine rise after a sweet snack. Over time, these associations become powerful drivers of preference de Araujo et al., 2008.

As such, our brain learns fast to link specific flavours with specific metabolic outcomes. As in the earlier example, sweet taste plus a rise in blood glucose teaches the brain to crave sugar.

And even though artificial sweeteners and many fruits contain little or no glucose, when paired with high-carbohydrate foods (e.g., low-sugar jam with a croissant or fruit with cornflakes), the brain links their sweet taste to the subsequent glucose surge. Over time, this conditioning strengthens the craving pathway at both behavioural and neural levels.

However, regular and intensive Exercise (The E out of TED) helps break this loop. Movement not only burns energy but also improves insulin sensitivity and modulates dopamine pathways, making it easier to “reset” reward associations. People who exercise regularly often find it easier to shift away from addictive food patterns.

👉 TED takeaway: put together, these systems explain why food isn’t just fuel. It’s a constant feedback loop, where your body teaches your brain what to want. You can use movement to retrain your brain’s learned food-reward pathways.


Your Gut Is Training You

We tend to think of the gut as just a digestion machine. But in reality, it’s a sensory system. As food moves through the stomach and intestines, neurons are watching closely. They respond to stretch (how full your gut is), texture, spiciness, and even temperature.

The most fascinating players are those neuropod cells. They act like food sensors, tuned to the chemistry of whatever you eat. The moment they detect sugars, fats, or amino acids, they send electrical signals to the brain in milliseconds Kaelberer et al., 2018. The brain responds by releasing dopamine, making you feel motivated to seek out more of that food.

This whole process is subconscious. You don’t “decide” that chocolate cake is rewarding. Your gut tells your brain before you even realize it.


Sweetness and the Dopamine Trap

Sweet taste gives us the clearest example of how these systems interact. Humans are naturally wired to like sweet things — especially children. Sweetness signals calories, which the brain rewards with dopamine.

So what about artificial sweeteners? Why are those still problematic? As explained earlier, sugar reliably increases blood glucose and dopamine. Non-caloric sweeteners taste sweet but don’t raise blood glucose. And at first, dopamine doesn’t budge. But here is the twist: with repeated exposure, artificial sweeteners do start to trigger dopamine. Why? Because your brain learns to expect that sweet taste to mean “energy incoming” Tellez et al., 2016.

And as already mentioned things get even more complicated when you pair diet drinks (sweet but calorie-free) with a burger and fries (calorie-dense). Over time, your brain begins to link the sweet taste with a metabolic effect. Later, even diet fizzy drink alone can change your insulin response, as if it contained sugar Swithers, 2013.

👉 A practical tip from TED? If you enjoy a diet or low-calorie drink, it is probably better to drink it separately from high-carb meals. Otherwise, you may condition your body to release insulin in ways that throw off blood sugar control. But of course, it would be ideal to avoid sugar or sweetener rich drinks all together especially if your meal is equally rich in carbs and instead… simply replace it with water!


The Psychology of Belief

It’s not just biology at play. Your mindset about food can literally change how your body reacts. Stanford University professor Alia Crum ran a striking study: participants were given the exact same milkshake but told two different stories about it. Some were told it was “indulgent, high-calorie, rich and satisfying.” Others were told it was “light, low-calorie, and healthy”. The results? The “indulgent” shake produced bigger rises in insulin, ghrelin (a hunger hormone), and blood glucose. People also reported feeling more satisfied Crum et al., 2011. The same drink or shake but a totally different body response, based only on belief.

This is not the classic placebo effect. It is a belief effect: our expectations about food shape our physiology!


Rewiring Your Cravings

Here’s the good news: your food preferences aren’t set in stone. Scientists describe them as soft-wired, flexible and open to change. Studies show that if you consistently eat a food for 7–14 days, especially when paired with enjoyable or energizing foods, your brain starts to assign more value to it. Translation: it literally tastes better over time (Wise, P. et al., 2016; Turner S et al., 2022; Small et al., 2019).

This is why people in different dietary war-camps like keto, vegan, Mediterranean, etc. Often feel so passionate about their way of eating and fight each other in research facts. Their brains have been conditioned to find their chosen foods the most rewarding.

And you can use the same principle to your advantage. Want to enjoy more leafy greens? Pair them with foods that give you a metabolic boost. Over time, your brain will start rewarding you for those choices.


The Bigger Picture

At the deepest level, your brain isn’t chasing sweetness, salt, or even dopamine. What it really wants is energy for neurons. Food preference is just the surface expression of this survival mechanism.

The catch? In today’s food environment, ultra-processed and hyper-palatable foods hijack this system. They deliver intense dopamine spikes that make ordinary, healthier foods seem bland by comparison Johnson & Kenny, 2010.

But the opposite is also true: by gradually shifting your diet toward whole, nutrient-rich foods, your dopamine system adapts, and those foods become genuinely more rewarding.


Final Thoughts

Food is far more than fuel. It’s a dialogue between taste buds, gut neurons, brain chemistry, and even your beliefs. Together, these systems decide what you crave, what satisfies you, and what you keep reaching for.

Perhaps a useful analogy would be to view food preferences as being both hard-wired and soft-wired. Hard-wired circuits push us toward energy-rich foods. Soft-wired associations, however, can be reshaped through repeated exposure and lifestyle choices. And this is where TED truly shines:

  • Tired → Sleep enough to regulate hunger and strengthen decision-making.
  • Exercise → Move daily to reset dopamine and insulin sensitivity.
  • Diet → Feed your gut and brain with nutrient-rich foods that train cravings. Add products like vinegar, lemon, kefir to your diet in order to keep the glucose spike down.

Modern processed foods hijack dopamine pathways, but TED offers a counterweight. With small, consistent shifts, better rest, regular movement, and smarter eating, you can rewire your cravings and restore balance. In a well-known study, participants drank the same milkshake but were told it was either “indulgent” or “low-calorie”. The indulgent version triggered stronger hormonal and metabolic responses, showing that belief changes physiology – so the mindset matters.

This is where TED would demand from you a renewed and improved attitude and mindset:

Diet: Choosing whole foods builds a narrative of self-care that strengthens psychological reward.

Tired: A good sleep and regular rest bites improve emotional regulation, making you less vulnerable to comfort eating and in general emotions are more manageable due to a less reactive amygdala.

Exercise: This list is very long – builds muscle, burns fat, deals with insuline resistance and overall boosts confidence and reinforces positive self-beliefs about health.


In short: TED isn’t just a checklist; it is a neuroscience-backed guide for aligning your lifestyle with the way your brain and gut actually work. By honoring the ‘big three‘, sleep, exercise, and diet, you can gradually teach your brain to want specific activities and foods that fuel health and wellbeing.

Recommended Reading

If you’d like to explore the science behind food preference and reward systems in more depth, here are a few excellent resources:

Shame: The Central Mechanism in Chronic Low Self-Esteem, a NeuroAffective-CBT® perspective

How Early Life Experiences Shape Our Sense of Self

From the moment we are born, our earliest interactions with caregivers begin shaping the lens through which we view ourselves and the world. While overt mistreatment, such as physical punishment, neglect, or abuse, is widely recognised, subtler forms of emotional harm can leave equally lasting psychological imprints. Persistent criticism, emotional invalidation, or unspoken parental expectations may quietly distort a child’s emerging sense of self.

Donald Meichenbaum’s early work on narrative-constructivism (Meichenbaum Free Publications, 2024) offers a powerful framework for understanding how early experiences form the foundation of identity. According to his model, children unconsciously develop internal narratives, or life scripts, based on the emotional messages they receive from caregivers. Behaviourist Daniel Mirea (2018) refers to these internalisations as “narrow lenses” through which we learn to interpret ourselves and our world. These scripts often hinge on perceived conditions for acceptance: “Be perfect,” “Don’t disappoint,” or “Always succeed”. They become internal blueprints for behaviour and identity.

When individuals deviate from these internalised rules, whether intentionally or not, it can evoke intense psychological distress. For instance, someone who grew up believing they must always please others may feel overwhelming shame and guilt when attempting to assert a boundary. Others might experience anxiety or self-sabotage when success feels incompatible with early messages that achievement would lead to rejection or disapproval. In these moments, the distress often doesn’t arise from the external situation itself, but from the unconscious violation of internal survival strategies. Breaking the script can feel like a betrayal of self, evoking shame, guilt, confusion, or resurfaced emotional pain. Therapeutic work that brings these early narratives to light, and helps individuals examine and reframe them, is often essential for healing and for the development of a more authentic, self-compassionate identity.

Just as overt mistreatment leaves scars, subtle emotional neglect and persistent invalidation can be just as damaging. Environments that emphasise a child’s flaws while ignoring their strengths, repeating phrases like “You could’ve done better”, or comparing them to siblings or peers, can lead to internalised shame. Over time, such experiences may cultivate what is often referred to as core shame: a deep, embodied sense of being defective, unworthy, or inherently unacceptable (Mirea, 2018). This shame can become embedded within the self-concept, reinforced by experiences of ridicule, teasing, or belittlement.

As children grow, the role of peer relationships becomes increasingly central to their self-esteem. During late childhood and adolescence, physical appearance, popularity, and social belonging rise in importance. Children who feel different, due to body image, skin conditions, or social exclusion, are especially vulnerable to shame-based beliefs such as “I’m ugly”, “I’m weird” or “No one likes me”. These beliefs are often intensified by social media, which promotes narrow, unrealistic standards of attractiveness and worth.

Social identity also plays a critical role. How society views and treats the communities we belong to, our culture, class, or ethnicity, shapes how we come to view ourselves. If one’s cultural group is marginalised or discriminated against, societal messages of inferiority or invisibility can deeply seep into the personal identity, compounding feelings of shame or self-doubt.

Importantly, not all harm stems from overt abuse or criticism. Sometimes it’s the absence of nurturing experiences, affection, praise, encouragement, or emotional presence that causes the most damage. Children with caregivers who are physically present but emotionally disengaged may grow up feeling unloved or unseen. Even when their material needs are met, the emotional void can lead to a persistent sense of being fundamentally flawed. Later in life, comparisons with peers who received emotional warmth can deepen this sense of inadequacy.

Such was the case with James. Throughout his childhood, he endured chronic emotional abuse, marked by relentless criticism, verbal attacks, and public humiliation, most often at the hands of his father during family gatherings or in front of peers. Over time, James internalised the belief that he could never measure up, that he would always fall short of his father’s expectations. To cope, he began to rely heavily on external validation and constant reassurance, grasping for fleeting moments of feeling “good enough”.

This emotional backdrop seeded a chronic sense of internalised shame, a deep “felt-sense” that he was fundamentally flawed. To emotionally survive this environment, James developed a set of coping strategies, what we might call life strategies, to navigate social situations and relationships where he felt undeserving or defective. These strategies helped him appear functional and even successful on the outside, but internally, they were rooted in fear, shame, and emotional self-protection.

Even minor interpersonal situations could trigger his shame. For example, if a university acquaintance asked him for a loan, even someone he barely knew or trusted, James felt unable to say “no,” even when his financial situation was precarious. Embarrassed and afraid of being disliked, he would give away money he couldn’t afford to lose. Despite sensing the relationship was one-sided or exploitative, he was unable to assert his needs.

After such encounters, James would spiral into self-criticism. He would replay the event, berating himself for not setting a boundary. In the days that followed, he felt guilt, sadness, and depression, compounded by the recognition that the money would likely never be returned. These episodes only reinforced his internal narrative of unworthiness and deepened his shame.

James’s patterns of behaviour reflected three common shame-based coping strategies: overcompensation, avoidance, and capitulation. He would overcompensate by being excessively generous and accommodating, often at the expense of his own wellbeing. He avoided assertiveness and confrontation, fearing rejection. And ultimately, he capitulated, silently accepting that betrayal of his own needs was the price of being liked. “If even my own father didn’t accept me”, he often thought, “why would anyone else?”

Over time, these strategies would become automatic, like an emotional autopilot. Through repeated use, they formed an internalised maintenance program, a hidden operating system, that reinforced his shame and shaped his sense of self across time. What began as a useful defence – a way to survive childhood, ended up as the foundation for chronic low self-esteem and shame, manifesting in symptoms that spanned both anxiety and depression.

Shame as a Core Mechanism

Shame often lies beneath overt symptoms of emotional distress. While clients frequently seek help for anxiety or depression, it is often shame that quietly drives much of their inner turmoil. In this light, chronic low self-esteem may be best understood as a shame-based condition.

Despite its central role, shame is often overlooked in psychotherapy, not out of neglect, but because it tends to remain hidden beneath more visible symptoms that feel immediate to the client. Clients typically tend to present symptoms of anxiety and depression, while the deeper, silent driver, shame, goes unaddressed. Yet neuroaffective research identifies shame as a core emotion, evolutionarily essential for social survival. Without the capacity for shame, early humans would have struggled to understand social hierarchies, maintain group cohesion, or follow communal norms. In this sense, shame originally served an adaptive purpose: to guide behaviour in socially acceptable ways (Matos, Pinto-Gouveia & Duarte, 2013).

Like all other core emotions, shame functions as a sudden “call to action“. It generates immediate internal distress, a state of hyper or hypo-arousal, which demands urgent behavioural regulation. People may respond with submission, withdrawal, compliance, or people-pleasing. These reactions serve as social survival mechanisms, especially for those raised in emotionally unsafe environments.

It is only natural that, when adaptive regulation is lacking, individuals revert to maladaptive strategies like lying, substance use, excessive niceness, or self-betrayal, often learned in childhood through repeated exposure to shame and invalidation.

And so, in a perceived social crisis when emotionally overwhelmed (i.e., activating event), individuals often unconsciously revert to coping mechanisms such as overcompensation, avoidance, or capitulation (i.e., surrendering to shame). These strategies may feel protective in the moment, offering a temporary sense of control or relief. However, they are often subtle forms of self-sabotage and ironically, they end up reinforcing the very shame they were unconsciously trying to manage or escape.

For instance, overcompensation may manifest as clinging to abusive relationships, giving away money one cannot afford to lose, pretending to like people one inwardly distrusts, or engaging in overly self-sacrificing behaviour, all in a desperate effort to gain acceptance or avoid perceived rejection. These actions may appear altruistic or generous on the surface but are often driven by deep fears of abandonment or worthlessness.

Capitulation occurs when a person begins to behave in ways that conflict with their true self, often to fit in or fulfil internalised narratives of inadequacy. In some cases, this leads to acting out beliefs like: “Since I’m already bad, I might as well be bad and show everyone just how bad I really am”. This distorted logic can result in self-destructive behaviours like compulsive gambling, excessive drinking, drug use, not necessarily driven by desire, but by hopelessness, self-punishment, or a deep yearning to belong. These behaviours serve as powerful, if maladaptive, emotional regulation tools. They may temporarily ease anxiety or internal chaos, but in the long term, they reinforce the painful identity narrative the person is trying to escape: the belief that they are defective, unworthy, or beyond help.

Avoidance strategies may involve a chronic inability to say “no”, withdrawing from social settings, procrastinating, or avoiding interactions that risk judgment or criticism. These behaviours offer immediate emotional relief but are rarely sustainable. Over time, their short-term success becomes neurologically reinforced, because they “worked” once, the brain learns to default to them automatically, even when they are no longer adaptive or helpful.

After the triggering event passes and the individual is left alone and reflective, a second emotional wave often emerges. Long episodes of rumination characterised by intrusive thoughts such as “Why am I like this?”, “I’m useless,”, “I always give money I don’t have,” or “No one ever helps me in return” begin to surface. This cascade of self-criticism and self-blame induces a temporary hypo-aroused state of guilt, thus reinforcing the shame cycle.

In this way, individuals can become trapped in recurring emotional loops, cycles of shame, anxiety, guilt, and depression, that are externally triggered, internally reinforced, and sustained by long-standing behavioural and neurobiological patterns. Over time, these behaviours cease to be mere reactions to isolated stressors; they evolve into a default operating system through which the individual interprets and navigates daily life. The underlying core shame remains unexamined, silently shaping emotional responses, relationship dynamics, and everyday decision-making.

Conclusion

Chronic low self-esteem is not merely a collection of negative thoughts or surface-level insecurities, it may be the visible tip of a deeper, shame-based emotional system. Often hidden beneath symptoms of anxiety or depression, shame fuels emotional dysregulation, self-sabotaging behaviours, and entrenched beliefs of unworthiness. Left unexamined, it becomes a silent architect of identity, shaping how one sees themselves, relates to others, and makes daily decisions.

Bringing shame into therapeutic awareness is rarely straightforward, yet it is essential. One of the challenges lies in the confusion that surrounds this complex and often misunderstood emotion. Shame is frequently mistaken for guilt, though the two serve distinct psychological functions. Guilt is behaviour-focused, “I did something wrong”, whereas shame is identity-based, “I am something wrong.” According to the NeuroAffective-CBT developmental model, guilt tends to emerge later in development, while shame takes root earlier, forming a foundational layer of the emotional system.



To loosen shame’s grip, it must be called out and named, explored, and brought into conscious awareness. Only then can individuals begin to interrupt its influence and develop more compassionate, flexible ways of relating to themselves and others.

Crucially, shame should not be demonised. It is part of an adaptive emotional system that evolved over thousands of years, to promote social cohesion and survival. The problem arises when shame becomes chronic and dominant, distorting self-perception, shaping behaviour, and stalling emotional growth. Shame is only painful when it governs the internal world unchecked. The goal in therapy is not to eliminate shame, but to understand its origins, normalise its presence, and dismantle the reinforcing patterns that keep it active.

In doing so, individuals begin to reclaim agency, authenticity, and emotional resilience. Despite its power, shame is not immutable. Through compassionate therapeutic inquiry and reflective self-awareness, people can challenge the narratives that shaped their inner world. By uncovering the roots of shame and gradually rewriting these internal scripts, individuals like James can move from survival toward authenticity, from emotional self-protection to genuine self-acceptance.

Glossary:

Adaptive vs. Maladaptive Behaviours
Adaptive behaviours are healthy coping mechanisms that support resilience, the ability to adapt constructively to difficult or stressful situations. They promote long-term emotional growth and psychological flexibility. In contrast, maladaptive coping mechanisms may offer short-term relief but ultimately reinforce avoidance, overcompensation, or capitulation. These strategies are unproductive and often harmful, preventing individuals from developing more adaptive ways of relating to themselves and others.

Core Emotions
In this article, core emotions (or core affects) are defined as primary emotional systems essential to survival, shared by most mammals. According to neuroaffective research and the work of neuroscientist Jaak Panksepp (2012), these include SEEKING (expectancy/curiosity), FEAR (anxiety), RAGE (anger), LUST (sexual excitement), CARE (nurturance), PANIC/GRIEF (sadness/loss), and PLAY (social joy). Clinical theorist Mirea proposes that SHAME, while derivative of FEAR, also functions as a core affect in humans, distinct yet equally vital for social survival. For example, the behaviour of a shamed or embarrassed dog illustrates how shame functions as a primitive, embodied emotional state.

Deeply-Rooted Beliefs (DRBs)
DRBs first mentioned by Mirea (2018) when describing the fundamentals of NeuroAffective-CBT, refer to early internalised felt-senses accompanied by corresponding beliefs and affective responses. These experiences are typically nonverbal and rooted in emotionally charged moments, often occurring before the individual has the language to articulate them. Originating in childhood, DRBs shape a rigid sense of identity and self-perception. As language develops, these implicit emotional experiences may later be verbalised, often for the first time in adulthood, particularly within a therapeutic setting. DRBs are resistant to change without external support, as individuals frequently dismiss conflicting evidence through cognitive distortions such as mental filtering, a mechanism explored in detail in Mirea’s approach NeuroAffective-CBT.

Felt-Sense / Gut-Sense / Gut-Feelings
These terms are used interchangeably throughout the paper to describe internal sensory experiences that arise in response to perceived threats or rewards. A felt-sense serves as an embodied memory of prior emotional events, functioning as an internal alarm system. It can manifest as a subtle tension, discomfort, or intuitive knowing, guiding decisions and emotional reactions even before conscious thought occurs.

References:

Panksepp, J. & Biven, L. (2012). The Archaeology of Mind: Neuroevolutionary Origins of Human Emotion. W. W. Norton & Company.

Matos, M., Pinto-Gouveia, J. and Duarte, C., 2013. Shame as a functional and adaptive emotion: A biopsychosocial perspective. Journal for the Theory of Social Behaviour, 43(3), pp.358-379. https://doi.org/10.1111/jtsb.12016

Meichenbaum D (2024). Don Meichenbaum Publications. URL: https://www.donaldmeichenbaum.com/publications (accessed 26.06.2025)

Mirea D (2024). If my gut could talk to me, what would it say? URL: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/382218761_If_My_Gut_Could_Talk_To_Me_What_Would_It_Say (accessed 26.06.2025)

Mirea D (2018). The underlayers of NeuroAffective-CBT. URL: https://neuroaffectivecbt.com/2018/10/19/the-underlayers-of-neuroaffective-cbt/ (accessed 26.06.2025)

Edited and supported by:

Dr Mark Paget URL: https://www.drmarkpaget.com/

Rejection Dysphoria: When ‘Feeling Rejected’ is more than what it seems…

Are you predisposed to self-doubt, low self-esteem, even long episodes of negative self-talk following perceived judgement or criticism in an ordinary discussion with your partner or in any other social situation? Are you highly sensitive to your partner’s opinions about you, even if not always entirely negative…? Do you often experience an intense emotional reaction in response to perceived criticism or rejection? Do you tend to put a negative spin on all positive feedback received from your partner (i.e., “Yes… But..”). Do you ever experience overwhelming anxiety or fear in anticipation of situations where a judgment or evaluation might occur? Have you noticed that your emotional responses to rejection or criticism are disproportionate to most situations? And last but not least, have you also been diagnosed with ADHD? And if not, do you normally struggle with poor focus, poor concentration, impulsivity or attention deficit in general?

If the answer to the above questions is overwhelmingly Yes’, then it is important to first of all know, that you are far from being alone. It is crucial to recognise that feelings of rejection are universal and not something to be ashamed of; feeling rejected is a human experience that transcends age, gender, and background. And secondly, according to some of the relating research, you might indeed be struggling with a condition known as Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (or RSD on short) which, experts like Dr William Dodson would suggest is part of the ADHD spectrum. According to the NHS, adults with ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) may find they have problems with keeping things organised, time management, following instructions and focusing on completing tasks, coping with stress, feeling restless or impatient, impulsiveness and risk taking. Due to impulsivity, difficulty following through, and a tendency to become distracted, adults with ADHD may experience challenges in relationships. They might forget important events, struggle to listen attentively, or have difficulty managing emotions, all of which can strain connections with others. The emotional aspects of ADHD, such as heightened sensitivity to criticism or rejection, would also contribute to interpersonal issues. Individuals may react strongly to perceived rejection or disapproval, leading to emotional outbursts or withdrawal.

Diagnosing ADHD is not as straight forward as it seems, not in the current clinical environment where ADHD specialists are few and far between in the UK and an assessment takes a significantly longer time to investigate. ADHD symptoms tend to be noticed at an earlier stage in life and are usually first pointed out by teachers during primary or even secondary school years. Some of the fortunate cases are diagnosed when children are under 12 years old and therefore would receive tailored support (medication + CBT via NHS) but much too often, ADHD would be diagnosed later in life. The assessment process is longer than usual, and ideally ought to include parental bio-psycho-social data which is not always available.

The increasing digitalisation of young adolescents’ lives presents yet another significant challenge when diagnosing ADHD. The growing integration of digital devices, social media, and online platforms into daily routines can have several effects on a young person’s bio-psycho-social development, potentially complicating the diagnostic process. The shift towards technology isn’t limited to entertainment; it’s pervasive in educational platforms, daily tasks, fitness routines, shopping, and even health services. These digital engagements place an enormous strain on the brain, particularly in adolescents whose brains are still developing, a process that continues until around the age of 24. Given the brain’s plasticity at this stage, it’s crucial to consider the impact of screen addiction, as it may lead to behavioural patterns that clash with real-world social interactions and cognitive demands. One of the core issues is that digital platforms provide instantaneous gratification, whether through swiping, liking, or receiving immediate feedback. This creates a mismatch with real-life interactions, where responses aren’t immediate, and social cues and conversations require patience and focus. In face-to-face interactions, we can’t hit “pause” or “swipe left” when we lose interest.

Young ambitious adults proudly advertise on their LinkedIn profiles, ‘I am an excellent multi-tasker and a doer’, without fully understanding the consequences. And of course, prospectives employers love it, thus rewarding it and reinforcing it even more. Nonetheless, research is pointing in a completely different direction. It is evident that hours of daily use, would lead to an increased reliance on screens to meet our basic needs and over years, this could lead to an attention deficit, lack of impulse control, poor attention-orientation or in other words, irritability, impatience, poor concentration and of course, lack of interpersonal skills. All these are symptoms replicated on the ADHD spectrum and by default Rejection Dysphoria.

The digital world offers a form of cognitive and behavioural convenience, where tasks are often broken into smaller, easily digestible chunks. However, this constant stimulation requires significant mental energy, leading to faster depletion of resources like glucose, which in itself supports the neurobiological addiction to technology. Over time, this may contribute to longer-term health issues such as pre-diabetes, a condition that has been increasingly observed in younger populations, especially those who rely heavily on digital devices (Mirea, 2024). Thus, it is essential to recognise how the digital world reshapes adolescents’ brains often with resulting emotions and behaviours reminding of an ADHD condition.

Whether the digitalisation of our lives is changing the human brain to the point that an ADHD personality will be the new norm, and the actual diagnosis will be dropped one day, remains speculative. For now, this suggestion should be viewed more like the domain of a conspiracy theory and as such, we must direct attention to the current empirical evidence and facts we know and understand. There is indeed a notable increase in the ADHD population with a prevalence of up to 5% among both the young and adult population. There is also a questionable trend among the secondary schools’ population in the UK, to request an ADHD investigation. It is equally evident that individuals that struggle with ADHD symptoms have significant interpersonal problems1 and therefore would fit the criteria for Rejection Dysphoria.

Rejection dysphoria could be summarised as a condition characterised by extreme emotional pain or discomfort in response to perceived or actual rejection, criticism, or failure. It is commonly associated with ADHD, where individuals may experience heightened sensitivity to negative feedback. However, although the data is lacking at the moment and, clinical experience shows that RSD symptoms can be common outside of the ADHD spectrum as well. Rejection dysphoria can lead to intense feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and low self-esteem, and may cause individuals to avoid situations where they fear rejection.

Effective NeuroAffective-CBT strategies for Rejection Dysphoria

 Psychoeducation

Understanding rejection dysphoria and its maintenance formula2 is an important first step. When we encounter rejection, our mind often produces a surge of unpleasant thoughts, reels and narratives that lead to intensive rumination3, self-criticism and self-blame. This creates significant psychological pain, sadness and fear. And in fact, these latter emotions are often the reason why clients come to therapy in the first place, so psychotherapists often investigate the emotional experience presented rather than the rejection dysphoria underlying it all.

The complex maintenance cycle for RSD can be explained via a relatively simple formula:

  • phase 1: Activating Situation
  • phase 2: I am not good enough/ Nobody wants Me
  • phase 3: Fear of Rejection
  • phase 4: Hyperarousal
  • phase 5: Avoidance
  • phase 6: Self-Criticism (resulting from avoidant behaviour)
  • phase 7: Sadness
  • phase 8: The maintenance cycle is closed off with an escalation of sadness, self-blame and self-criticism which confirms the original deeply-rooted6 belief (phase 2) and the dominant fear of rejection (phase 3). It is important to mention that the maintenance program is not always linear (or circular), and sometimes avoidant behaviour (phase 5), can instantly create a feedback loop by reinforcing the ‘Not Good Enough-Nobody Wants Me’ deeply-rooted belief.

This formula can enable the individual to identify triggering situations that would easily activate this maintenance cycle. It facilitates a ‘pause’, taking a moment, to breathe and observe one’s thoughts and feelings from a safe distance, without judgment. This is a good opportunity to engage in a more realistic and compassionate Self-to-Self dialogue between the Wise Mind and the Anxious Mind for example, ‘…here we go again… here comes my rejection script into play…’. This is often an empowering process that helps individuals understand the difference between a construct of the mind and a narrative or a script created as a maintenance program that favours the rejection dysphoria, rather than the actual reality.

Writing therapy – Journaling

Thinking should not necessarily lead to believing and impulsive acting !

CBT provides a useful framework for understanding the relationship between (triggering) situations, thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. By engaging in journaling, individuals can break down their experiences and assess them more objectively, especially when faced with challenging emotions such as those triggered by fear of rejection. Here’s how the process could work, using the example of rejection:

  1. Triggering Situation: The first step is to identify and write down the situation that triggered the emotion. For example, “I was not invited to my friend’s gathering.
  2. Automatic Thoughts and Images: This involves noting down the initial thoughts and mental images that arise in response to the triggering event. For example, “I must have done something wrong,” or “They don’t care about me anymore.” These thoughts are often automatic and not necessarily grounded in fact.
  3. Emotions and Intensity: Next, it’s helpful to note the emotions experienced and their intensity. Using a scale from 0 to 100, one might rate how intensely they feel emotions like sadness, anger, or anxiety. For instance, “I feel 80% sad and 50% angry.
  4. Evidence for and Against the Thought: This is where CBT helps distinguish between thoughts and beliefs. By writing down evidence for and against the automatic thought (e.g., “I must have done something wrong“), a person can begin to evaluate whether the thought is realistic or based on assumptions. For example:
    • Evidence for: “I haven’t been in touch with my friend much recently.
    • Evidence against: “I haven’t done anything to upset them. They might have simply forgotten.
  5. Reevaluation and Perspective: The goal is to challenge unrealistic thinking. This process involves considering alternative explanations and recognising that not all thoughts are facts. For instance, “Not being invited doesn’t mean they don’t care about me,” or “People forget things sometimes.
  6. Behavioural Response: The final step involves considering how the individual might behave differently if they fully accepted the more balanced thought. Perhaps instead of withdrawing or acting out of anger, they might reach out to the friend to express their feelings or simply move forward without assuming the worst.

The above process helps individuals become more aware of the patterns of their thinking, the validity of their assumptions, and the impact those thoughts have on their emotions and behaviours. Through journaling and reflection, they can foster greater emotional resilience, clearer thinking, and healthier responses to perceived rejection or other challenging situations (Rude S. et al., 2011)5 .

Compassionate-Acceptance

and Commitment to New Actions !

Compassionate-acceptance can also help navigate feelings of rejection more effectively, by dealing directly with the inevitable avoidance (phase 5). Avoidance is natural, when we fear something we tend to stay away. But in the case of fear of rejection, avoidance is a lot more subtle, for example not speaking out about the feelings experienced inside, procrastinating, putting things off, etc. Understanding the maintenance formula helps identifying such maladaptive avoidant strategies. Accepting without judgement that avoidance ‘feels right’ at times (i.e., it is understandable that I should feel like this..) but also accepting the need for a new direction – a committed action.

For example.. Avoidance (name the type of avoidance – “procrastination“) feels right in the moment but it is not always the best course of action in the long run, since it does not lead to creative, healthier or more adaptive alternatives, just as my formula suggest…. besides, I made a commitment to change and implement… (name the new coping strategy – “I am a go-getter and a doer, what’s the worst that can happen).

Compassionate-acceptance can be a challenging practice, especially during moments of emotional distress, rejection, or pain. The key to cultivating self-compassion is to recognise that emotions means being alive, part of the human experience, and that it’s okay to feel difficult emotions without trying to immediately change them or suppress them. This accepting self-talk is foundational to healing and inner resilience. Using self-kindness or compassionate statements that resonate would help the process e.g., ‘this is a difficult moment; this is a painful experience; I hurt because I actually do care… Mistakes are part of being human, they do not need define me‘; etc.

Self-regulation methods for dearousal

What goes up, must come down…

An interesting tool recommended by NeuroAffective-CBT is Pausing and Observing – pausing with the curiosity of a scientist or even that a child, observing and labelling an unpleasant emotion experienced, rather than allowing it to worry you. Note the intensity of an emotion from 0-10 and once again, take a curious interest in the fact that the emotion experienced is not always felt as an extreme or an all-or-nothing phenomenon instead, it has different levels of intensity. Finally, locating it within the body allows for an isolation of the problem and an intentional reduction to its psychosomatic dimension. For example, a tightness in the chest muscle on a level of ‘5’ sounds a lot better than – this thought must be true because it hurts so bad inside. This would enable the next step which is the progressive relaxation of the muscular distress identified in that region. Rejection sensitivity and anxiety in general, triggers a stress response in our bodies, known as the fight-flight or the threat system. This involves a range of physiological responses including muscle tightness and muscular contractions.

Engaging in emotional regulation techniques such as progressive muscle relaxation (or PMR), abdominal breathing, body scanning or comprehensive-distancing, can help gradually turn the threat system off which eventually leads to dearousal – the process that turns off the fight-flight system.

It is easier to achieve emotional-distancing from a position of ‘calm’. Comprehensive-Distancing in NeuroAffective-CBT involves looking at the experience of rejection, rather than looking from, or through the lenses of rejection, almost as if one would look at a movie or an external script or a narrative unfolding before him or her, and accepting that, after all these are all normal products of a stressed mind. This external perspective can speed up the fading of negative emotions. Psychoeducation and understanding the basic maintenance formula helps with catching early the triggering narrative which prevents the activation of the whole maintenance cycle.  

If comprehensive-distancing helps gain a fresh perspective and creates distance from negative thoughts and unpleasant emotions, Distraction Techniques are slightly different and it may involve watching a favourite show, physical exercise, walking, running, a cold shower, or any other activity leads to a reduction in the emotional intensity.

Abdominal Breathing or diaphragmatic breathing is arguably the most important component of the relaxation process. It can be used in parallel with PMR or as a tool on its own. When we experience rejection, our bodies may perceive it as a threat to our safety. Once again, deep breathing can also signal to the parasympathetic nervous system that you are safe. As a rule, when breathing abdominally the abdomen expands and slowly relaxes in perfect synch with the exhalation process which must be twice as long as the inhalation part. The whole breathing in–holding –breathing out, process could last up to 10-16 seconds, the longer the better.

  1. Find a Comfortable Position: Sit or lie down in a quiet place where you feel at ease.
  2. Inhale Deeply: Through your nose, inhale slowly for a count of about 4 seconds, allowing your abdomen to rise.
  3. Hold the Breath: Hold your breath for a count of about 2 to 4 seconds.
  4. Exhale Slowly: Breathe out through your mouth for a count of about 8 seconds, ensuring the exhalation is longer than the inhalation.
  5. Repeat: Continue this cycle for several minutes while focusing on the sensation of your breath and your body relaxing.

Abdominal breathing is not the easiest style of breathing to master, and it feels a little unnatural, sounding and feeling more like an unconscious ‘sigh’. In fact, for all intents and purposes, it could well be a deep long sigh. The act of sighing often involves a deep inhalation followed by a longer exhalation, which mirrors the principles of abdominal breathing. Sighing is part of the circadian rhythm6 of calming the body down and rejuvenating the blood with oxygen. When we sigh, we often take a deep breath in, followed by a slow, extended exhale. This act serves as a natural way to release tension in the body and helps reset our respiratory system. In fact, sighing can be thought of as the body’s way of re-establishing a balance in our breathing, particularly when stress or shallow breathing has been lingering. Both sighing and abdominal breathing activate the diaphragm more fully than regular chest breathing, promoting a greater exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide, which helps calm the nervous system.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)

PMR refers to a gradual tensing up and relaxation of all muscle groups in a specific order; starting with the head and facial muscles and working downward through all major muscle groups. Body Scanning is a similar procedure where muscles are relaxed only with a focused-attention but no previous tensing is necessary in this case.  Visualising images that commonly induce a state of relaxation, the sun, a beach, a green field, trees etc., can add to the experience.

It can be equally useful to prepare a list of soothing activities or items in advance, for easier use during intense emotions. Engaging all five sensory modalities light-vision, taste, smell, sound and temperature can equally assist with attention-orientation and focus, grounding and feelings of safety. Being relaxed or in a state of ‘calm’ means feeling safe. It is important to understand cultural differences, personal values, and preferences and to identify what specifically soothes an individual; taking a warm bath or enjoying lavender scents might work for some but not for others. These are all attention-training and relaxation exercises commonly known as mindfulness exercises, PMR or grounding, all developed within the field of CBT with a clear purpose – to increase one’s ability to focus on sensations without fear or judgement, to learn to redirect attention as needed to regulate the autonomous nervous system and to eventually reduce the impact of rejection sensitivity.

PMR was first introduced as a behavioural treatment by Edmund Jacobson in 1929 and has proven to be one of the most effective interventions for stress management to date. Jacobson was able to prove the connection between excessive muscular tension and different disorders of body and mind. He found out that tension and exertion was always accompanied by a shortening of the muscular fibres, that the reduction of the muscular tonus decreased the activity of the central nervous system, that relaxation was the contrary of states of excitement and well suited as a general remedy and prevention against inflammatory and psychosomatic disorders.

 

Conclusion

Rejection dysphoria, whether a significant part of ADHD or a condition on its own, it tags along significant emotional pain which eventually dents our inner resilience. The prospect of navigating through life under the fear of constant rejection, goes against our very own survival instinct. The possibility of losing someone becomes somatically, extremely painful. Hence, it is such painful events and the emotions resulting from rejection, we are trying to avoid at all costs. And this is only natural to us since, as a mammal species, we are neither designed, nor would we ever evolve to a level, where surviving alone is a desirable option.

The answer almost always is, cultivating inner resilience. Confidence and acceptance are essential aspects of building emotional resilience and nurturing hope. Emotional resilience is not about avoiding emotional pain but instead it is about learning how to navigate through it with greater ease. By acknowledging the impact of rejection and adopting a curious stance towards new opportunities and excitement about the future possibilities, we develop acceptance and willingness to invite whatever may come along – if one door closes, another one opens!

Practicing self-compassion, and developing strategies for emotional regulation and self-acceptance, can work toward cultivating both confidence and emotional resilience. Confidence and emotional resilience are in fact, intertwined. Resilience is not just about bouncing back, but about learning, evolving, and embracing our emotions with kindness and acceptance.

As we continue to navigate life’s challenges and bounce back from setbacks, our confidence grows. Each experience of navigating emotional pain and emerging stronger, builds a foundation for the next challenge, reinforcing our sense of self-worth and ability to handle whatever comes our way. In essence, emotional resilience is a lifelong practice. It is ultimately, about embracing the full range of human emotions, staying open to new experiences, and treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding that we would offer to others.

Foot Notes

1 Interpersonal problems, refers to difficulties and conflicts that arise in relationships between individuals. These issues can manifest in various forms, such as communication barriers, misunderstandings, disagreements, or emotional struggles. Interpersonal problems may occur in personal relationships, such as family and friendships, as well as in professional settings, including workplace dynamics. Common causes include differences in values, personalities, expectations, and communication styles. Addressing these problems typically involves improving communication, developing empathy, and finding common ground.

2 In CBT, the maintenance formulation refers to the concept that explains how certain thoughts, behaviours, and environmental factors contribute to the persistence of psychological problems. It typically includes the following components:

  1. Cognitive Factors: Negative thought patterns or cognitive distortions that individuals may hold about themselves, others, or their situation.
  2. Behavioural Factors: Specific behaviours that reinforce the problem, such as avoidance, substance use, or maladaptive coping strategies.
  3. Emotional Factors: Emotions that arise from cognitive and behavioural patterns, often contributing to distress.
  4. Environmental Factors: Contextual or situational elements that maintain or exacerbate the issue, such as social support or life stressors.

The maintenance formula helps therapists and clients understand how these elements interact to sustain a disorder, allowing for targeted interventions to break the cycle and promote positive change. By addressing each component, clients can develop healthier thought patterns, behaviours, and coping mechanisms.

3 Rumination, refers to intensive and counterproductive worry. The process of continuously thinking about the same problem, thoughts or feelings, often in a repetitive and counterproductive manner. It typically involves dwelling on negative experiences or distressing emotions rather than resolving them. Rumination can lead to an increase in anxiety, depression, and stress, as it focuses on past events and perceived failures, preventing constructive problem-solving. In a clinical context, it is often associated with various mental health disorders and can hinder recovery. Strategies to manage rumination include mindfulness practices, cognitive-behavioural techniques, and engaging in distracting or constructive activities.

4 Deeply-rooted beliefs (DRBs) have been described in detail by Mirea (2024) and refers to the lenses through which we see the world and ourselves. DRBs have been characterised in the psychotherapeutic literature as schemas by J Young or P Salkovskis. Dr Donald Meichenbaum suggests, DRBs are core organising principles, often sounding like a code of honour, which the individual cannot afford to break, the cost would be too high, and yet consciously unknown.

5 Rude S et al., 2011. Social Rejection: how best to think about it. This research supports the idea that expressing feelings and contemplating potential outcomes even after a rejection experience, can help individuals process their emotions more effectively. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10608-010-9296-0

6 Circadian rhythm is like a biological clock influenced by external cues, such as light and temperature, and plays a crucial role in determining sleep patterns, feeding behaviour, hormone release, and other bodily functions. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1087079203900025

If my gut could talk to me, what would it say ?

Introducing James…

James is a successful banker enjoying significant authority and respect at work. Being into sports and a healthy lifestyle, he is tall and handsome, he has a beautiful wife and two children. On paper all is well, and so he would be taken by surprise every weekend when visiting his parents’ home for Sunday lunch, by the experience of intense, discomforting, and painful butterflies, in anticipation of this recurring event. He is left confused, without an explanation.

Allowing for an earlier narrative to unfold within the first few hours of therapy, childhood experiences were revealed, where he experienced similar painful feelings, generated by a critical and highly demanding father, the kind of parent that would be difficult to please. His mother never interfered and to James, this was as bad as his father’s attitude. His childhood was dotted with various episodes of unfavourable comparisons with a younger and brighter sister. 

Despite his success and handsome appearance, he sees himself as ugly, unattractive, unwanted, enjoying some professional success through sheer luck, an impostor, and a trickster. He remained hypervigilant throughout the years around his father and eager to be validated. He gets overwhelmed with anticipatory anxiety before every single meeting with his parents.

When gently exposed to these issues during therapy, he acknowledged a connection with early experiences right away, he realised that he feels the same way around other men or women in authority, and yet he remained equally confused and troubled by these dominant, painful gut-feelings1.

******

I can feel it in my gut‘ or ‘trust your gut’ we often say to ourselves or each other, perhaps for very good reasons. Scientists have recently established clear links between our gut and the brain, not necessarily through an analysis of the diversity of the microbiome that exists within our gut, although this turns out to be equally relevant (Skonieczna-Zydecka K et al., 2018), but also by paying attention to the actual structure of the gut at a cellular level (Kaelberer M et al., 2020).

The biological dimension

Dr Kaelberer and colleagues identified a direct pathway from the gut to the brain, that essentially allows sensing of what is happening in the gut, in order to inform specific emotions whether pleasure or disgust, and the resulting behaviours. This would, at least in part, explain cravings and associated compulsive actions, and furthermore, it helps explain why the regular practising of mindfulness or paying calm, non-judgemental attention inwards, could lead to a shift in feelings and better emotional-regulation (Golding and Gross, 2010).

The gut-brain communication happens through versatile and adaptable neuropod cells with electrical sensors within the gut structure, which are able to select and specialise in various essential chemicals like glucose, proteins or amino acids. These cells can program to organise digestion and send information via electrical signals straight to the brain, which will make further informed decisions on what to feel and how to respond to certain products, in a given situation. Although not the only sensorial command centre, it does appear that, the human 9- to 10-meter-long gut, could be the largest internal organ with immediate access to the external world.  Running through the upper body, from the rectum to the esophagus, and in constant communication with the brain, the gut is able to provide an individual, with a fuller experience of what it means to engage with useful edible products, like enjoying a coffee with a cookie in the morning, where the individual is likely to experience both pleasure and a sudden increased in energy. Seems ‘the gut’ may indeed be one of the biggest organs inside our body, but reaching as far as the external or the social world, is not something psychologists would have taken into account until now.

Inside the gut something equally fascinating takes place, which further strengthens the relationship between the human gut and the brain. Our intestine has about 39 trillion microorganisms called microbiome and it consists mostly of bacteria, viruses and fungi – the microbiome produces chemicals which can send messages to the brain through the vagus nerve. This nerve starts in the brainstem, it travels down the neck and alongside the carotid arteries and into the chest branching out towards internal organs, as a result it can manage gut contractions (peristalsis) and heart rate – this makes the vagus nerve relevant when it comes to the human relaxation response.

We now know, that people who suffer from chronic stress have very different microbiomes and ‘bad’ bacteria that produce inflammation, as opposed to a healthy individual who would have a diverse population of bacteria strains. This has serious clinical implications and recent research has in fact shown, that levels of depression would improve when injected with a specific bacteria (faecal). Although these bacteria is proving difficult to reproduce artificially in a lab, the link between the gut micorbiome and the brain explains why certain diets, like the Mediterranean diet, and foods (like pre/probiotics) would have a direct impact on the mood. A healthy diet is associated with a 30% reduction in depression.

Good gut health means good overall health !

The psychosocial dimension

Humans like most other mammals have rituals around eating, drinking and socialising. Such events are usually inter-linked and incredibly important to evolution. Those are ideal occasions to get to know one another, to court each other, to test our emotions, bond and reproduce. Often a potential partner is treated to a freshly cooked meal with a personal touch. This enhances the possibility of having a relationship. Social rituals such as feeding a child, courtship or even kissing, demonstrate how the gut is constantly interacting with the brain and through a perfect symphony of electrical signals, enzymes, and various chemicals, it assists with social bonding, and the selection of the most appropriate partner. This is where the notion of ‘butterflies in the stomach’ takes a completely different meaning when two lovers meet, versus two people shouting at each other in extreme anger. All individuals involved in these very different scenarios, would report experiencing butterflies in the stomach with different levels of intensity. This turns out to be nothing short of cells and electricity at work, dutifully completing their shift. Just another day in the office.

Through stories we reach the world around us…

 Homo-sapiens are also ‘homo-narrans’ (Meichenbaum D, 2017). We have an innate ability to observe our own thoughts, to think about our thinking in vivid images, pictures, or even short video clips, and ultimately describe with various details, the content of our thoughts and conclusions. This is what we label as ‘stories’. In fact, we rarely think in clear and brief thoughts, but instead our minds, seem to be dominated by stories involving all sensory modalities, a pleasant memory of a sensual encounter has sounds, smells and tastes, alongside vivid video-reels which unconsciously lead to arousal.

  ‘The early bird catches the worm’.

We grow up ‘feeding’ on stories, symbols and metaphors; most of us will remember with great pleasure childhood messages and proverbs repeated to exhaustion by our parents and grandparents, in the hope that we would learn to behave more appropriately, in line with our social context and culture. The messages we remember the most, have an interesting narrative behind them, rich in details and sensorial pleasures. The teacher that inspired us during school years, was most likely, the best storyteller. Story telling is a natural gift often unexplored and unnourished.

Stories we tell ourselves reflect earlier experiences and are used as a learning platform. They have to make contextual sense of the world we live in, and as such, our personal narratives, are influenced and adapted over time in order to fit in, with continuously evolving circumstances (Hickes and Mirea, 2012). This would of course, in turn, ensure survivability and psychological resilience over the course of lifetime. Failure to update old narratives can create psychological rigidity, which leads to internal distress and therefore, predispose individuals to mental illness.

Indeed, this fascinating oval-shape mass of grey, which we refer to, as the ‘brain’, is plastic. In other words, it has the ability to biologically modify itself and adapt to new circumstances (another area the conscious mind1 is not consulted about), with only one important mission that supersedes everything else – keeping us alive! Therefore, the stories we tell ourselves are not designed to generate feelings of happiness or sadness, since those are not essential to our survival. Although we know this is at times possible, the brain’s main priority is to keep the organism or the body as a whole, functional and alive.

The cognitive-behavioural dimension

 When the gut communicates with the brain, it is purposeful, and it demands an immediate reaction. Intense emotions lead to compulsive behaviours, bypassing the mind completely, e.g., when one is hungry, the resulting senses, known as cravings or feelings of pain and discomfort in the gut area, lead to an urgency to find something to eat, the mind is simply trying to resolve this problem by going to previously memorised solutions.

Therefore, cognitions are products of an extremely busy brain with no time off. Best understood as essential components of a regulatory system informed by thought, experience, memory, language, sensorial data or felt-sense2, and deeply-rooted beliefs3. It may not always be easy, but it is possible to override one’s felt-sense or gut-feelings, if we start engaging our prefrontal abilities by reframing the experience and simply view DRBs as, the dialectical expression of a felt-sense. This can be achieved through new learning, and new experiences. Humans, unlike other mammals, do this all the time, we are very good at convincing ourselves that something is good for us, through repetition or rehearsal, when in fact, our gut is telling us that the opposite is true. For example, eating lots of sugar, drinking alcohol or smoking. In a different context, it could be argued that learning how to override painful gut-feelings, might be the very purpose of a psychotherapeutic treatment specifically, helping individuals overcome painful gut-feelings, or felt-senses which internally suggest they are flawed or not good enough.

Deeply-rooted beliefs might be best understood as the first layer of defence, a deeper screening or filtering system that helps an individual navigate through the complexities of life, in spite of a dominating gut-feeling that he is not good enough. These types of senses are reminders of previous experiences and nothing short of ‘brain statements’ or brain’s best possible interpretation of early life experiences. Whether frequent exposure to extended periods of affection, or at the other end of the spectrum exposure to neglect, characterised by intense pain signals and experienced mostly by the gut, and felt within the upper body regions. Since our brain does not use language per se, to ‘shout out’ warnings to the mind, various electrical signals are sent back and forth between brain structures and different parts of the gut, on every single occasion we find ourselves in a situation that points toward a reward or indeed a threat (i.e., neglect). Sensorial signals alerting an individual of a potential reward or threat, depending on the developmental stage, could be processed linguistically and translated into deeply-rooted beliefs of lovability (pleasure) or unlovability (rejection), but this is rarely needed outside of a therapy session. And of course, lack of awareness and language speeds up the process of getting a reward or running away from neglect or threat. Once the Mind gets involved, everything slows down and is investigated with the curiosity of a scientist.

We have now understood that DRBs are not seen or heard but felt deep inside the body at a gut level and they are not interpreted by a mind which does not even fully develop before the age of two. Therefore, not only that language is not needed when chasing a reward or running away from a threat, but DRBs have no immediate linguistic correspondent, since the gut-brain axis is bypassing the temporal lobe responsible for language processing. Studies suggest that the prefrontal cortex, or the ‘mind’, starts developing within the first two years of life, since basic brain structure and connectivity is present by this age (Huttenlocher & Dabholkar, 1997), but continues until the mid-twenties, which marks an end to our adolescent stage and a slowing down of brain neuroplasticity (Siegel D, 2020). 

Attachments and emotional neglect

British developmental psychologist and psychiatrist John Bowlby is one of the most recognisable names associated with attachment research (1988). His evolutionary theory suggests that children come into the world biologically pre-programmed to form attachments with others, since this will help them survive. Indeed, a child that has been emotionally neglected by one of his main caregivers, might not have been a victim of a physically or sexually aggressive parent, nonetheless the child would internalise the absence of warmth and physical affection as threatening, incredibly painful, confusing and difficult to navigate. A child depends for many years on his parents, in order to survive and thrive. And therefore, to a child, the prospect of disappointing a parent is a risky business. Chronically it would be painful, with many types of manifestations and physiological symptoms, like muscle spasms or butterflies inside the body. Not being able to process the experience of rejection or make any sense of it, the gut-brain axis constantly makes decisions on what is healthy and what is not. Eventually these decisions are introduced into our contextual world via stories that we imagine and tell ourselves. These early narratives have implicit deeply-rooted beliefs, not yet linguistically formulated but with clear sensorial messages and themes centred around unlovability, rejection, unworthiness or unacceptability. When finally expressed or spoken ‘out loud’, the language is as varied as individuals’ backgrounds, largely subjected to individuals’ culture, education, imagination and linguistic skills.

Perceived social threats such as criticism and rejection or the prospect of living alone, can be frightening because the gut does not like neglect or going without. Emotional neglect is a real threat in childhood, because it is synonymous with deprivation of essentials, including food and ultimately death. Humans bond to survive. The threat of being alone is basically unbearable to the gut and body by extension.

Deeply-Rooted Beliefs and Contextual-Acceptance

When He says, He is ugly, He also means ‘’The world does not like Me’… and this is the part that really frightens.

 It could be speculated that emotional neglect is more impactful on the gut because of the physiological deprivation suffered by the organism. Deprivation of positive affection is associated with lack of appetite or compensatory appetite which leads to the production of specific enzymes and hormones. Whereas, with other types of exerted aggression, the gut suffers less organic deprivation, refocuses on healing, and learns to reprogramme itself allowing for adaption of the whole organism (Kaelberer M, et al., 2020). This could explain why in certain cultures, where physical discipline is widely spread, the actual ‘physical abuse’ does not lead to post-traumatic stress, and it has little or no impact on the immunity and physical health. This type of parenting is not perceived as abusive within the community at large because biologically, it is not significantly harmful, and the emotional dimension is invisible and easier to ignore. The parenting model is therefore normalised, perceived as efficient and often replicated by other families. These sophisticated lines of defence could be viewed as a type of socio-homeostatic process or organism’s attempt to repair and adapt itself through the practice of cultural values and contextual-acceptance.

 Deeply-rooted beliefs therefore, may have a regulatory purpose and essentially teach the organism, or the body to adapt.

My dad was a little hard on me yesterday, sorry I could not meet you but, I was in a bit of a state’… Friend replies: ‘your dad is fine, you should meet mine… but to be fair, I still hate my homework and love to sneak out for a smoke’.

In a practical sense, to survive and even thrive in, what could be perceived as a harsh environment, requires normalising and acceptance of external living conditions, also coined in this paper, as ‘contextual-acceptance’. Whilst seeing the world through myopic unlovability lenses, James has to adapt to various contexts and whatever else life throws at him, in order to continue to survive and grow in spite of, a dominating felt-sense which strongly suggests he is unappreciated, and likely to be rejected.

‘Since nobody likes me, I have to make more effort than anyone else and behave in ways that will ensure I am safe – despite what everyone really thinks of me’James would often think to himself, during moments of self-reflection. This type of contextual-acceptance can override the dominating gut-feeling, it leads to psychological adaptation and resilience. When contextual-acceptance is denied, an episode of emotional crisis would be inevitably triggered.

 The regulatory quality of deeply-rooted beliefs, also means that they can be accompanied by both negative and positive affective experiences. Someone falling in love or desiring someone sexually feels an acute pain inside the body, within areas of the gut, but this is not registered in a negative manner by the brain and, since it is not a threat, it does not activate fear and avoidance.

By contrast, just thinking about food when hungry can lead to secreting specific enzymes and further compulsive eating behaviours. Going for a driving test can lead to feeling sick in spite of being well prepared.  At times, people throw up when faced with social fears and other times they avoid a challenging test all together. It all seems to depend on the lenses the individual uses, because sure enough, when individuals look at the outside world through their unlovability lenses, the whole world would appear likely to reject them, no matter how well behaved they are. It takes effort and motivation to override the gut-feeling. Deeply-rooted beliefs therefore, create myopic lenses but contextual-acceptance heals the pain that comes with it.

Conclusions

Deeply-rooted beliefs have been characterised in the psychotherapeutic literature as schemas by Jeffrey Young (2003) and Paul Salkovskis (1996), core organising principles, often sounding like a code of honour, which the individual cannot afford to break, the cost would be too high, and yet consciously unknown. As such, James’ life was rigidly governed and guided by his unlovability and worthlessness telescope-type lenses

DRBs are the lenses through which we see the world and ourselves. Supported and confirmed by the gut and with help from specific brain structures, they act as deeply rooted filters, allowing into our consciousness only what the gut-brain-axis feels is relevant to our survival. And as we have already established, the human gut and brain, are not concerned with our happiness or material wealth.

However, the axis is capable of both good and evil and can be persuaded to change and reprogramme the lenses through which we see our life, through an ample process of education and self-awareness, new learning and new coping practices, all key aspects of change. It appears that, just like with any other muscle, all organs inside our body need retraining with consistency over time. 

There is nothing more captivating than an authentic story which can send clear motivational messages about meaningful changes and potential solutions. People have been preoccupied with sharing their ideas, personal stories, discoveries, and inventions for thousands of years.  Historical writings and drawings on the cave walls are testimony to that fact. Telling ourselves and each other stories, is so embedded within our psychological framework, it has become an essential part of our existence, for where would we be, if it was not for our stories? We tell stories to confirm and justify our very existence. 

It appears that stories are very likely, part of our genetical make up and therefore it is not much of stretch to consider that internal storytelling or the narratives we repeat to ourselves, are not only generated, but also perpetuated by our felt-senses or gut-feelings, designed to cement beliefs about who we are, how we could fit into our world, how we need to behave, and what our future prospects are.

Some of our gut decisions are truly worthy of our trust, but we have demonstrated how at times, the gut is misinformed by neglect and emotional deprivation. It falls onto the therapist to guide the patient4 with sensitivity, kindness and compassion, through the sea of vast, often stormy narratives, in order to make sense of the deeply-rooted beliefs’ images, sounds and smells, covert meanings and values.

Perhaps because deeply-rooted beliefs are primarily supporting a survival instinct, those are not always in sync with ideal and current personal values, generated by a fast pacing, ever-changing society. The modern world, the speed of development supported by human creativity, forces us to constantly work on redefining what authentic living means, based on contextual-acceptance.

Whatever this means for each individual, it can only be achieved by constantly refocusing the lenses through which we see ourselves and others, and override deeply-rooted beliefs that support an older way of living or dated values. Charles Darwin, a passionate evolutionary biologist, and author of ‘The origins of species’ (1859) might have been among the first to note that organisms, much like the human organisms with all their guts and brains, would never fail to either adapt or die. It is simply a question of survival.

The ‘Gut – Brain – Affect’ triangle: paving the way to future research and development

Traditionally, psychotherapists have been more interested in the interplay between mind, feelings and actions that lead to ‘psychological pain’ often without being able to answer questions about the subjective feeling of ‘suffering’. Where is all the ‘suffering’coming from, and what are its main characteristics?

  The notion of ‘deeply-rooted beliefs’ attempts to answer this dilemma by proposing an investigation into the fascinating world of the ‘gut-brain-affect’ triangle. Searching for answers in an area, that has not been fully explored by psychology just yet, is more than challenging and leads to more questions than answers. At the same time, new and older research studies from physiology, nutrition, attachments, and neuroaffective-biology seem to open a world of therapeutic possibilities.  

If the gut and the brain are in constant and autonomous communication (or outside of our awareness), and they make behavioural decisions for us all the time, then it is safe to assume that nutritional and other daily occupational habits, such as the proverbial rest, work, and play, could impact more significantly on our mental health, than ever anticipated (Mirea, 2023). We have always known this instinctively, but the bio-psycho-social processes operating in the background remain a mystery.

This review barely scratches the surface of an intricate world of internal highways of communication, hidden within the human infrastructure, which ultimately leads to behavioural and social decisions, every moment, of every single day. Decisions that ultimately, impact on our wellbeing, quality of life and overall existance.

The article certainly raises more questions than answers, we do not seem to fully understand all the mechanisms that support gut’s constant communication with the brain. But if indeed ‘we are what we eat’ then, psychologists and psychotherapists need to start paying more attention to how nutrition is impacting on our mental health, not just the physical health. Perhaps it falls on the domain of evidence-based psychology to align itself with relevant research from the fields of nutrition, physiology, or neuroscience, in order to better understand the individuals’ relationship with food, digestion, hormones and mental health as well as the environmental impact.

Some progress has been noted in understanding the links between the gut microbiome and depression, but much remains undiscovered and sadly, the psychotherapy community continues to remain silent and uninvolved.  This article therefore assumes the risk of going into unchartered territories, potentially exposing many gaps within psychotherapy research. It points toward the sophisticated inner technology of the gut-brain-affect axis with significant implications for mental health treatments. Let’s consider for instance, the relationship between our integumentary system5, emotions, sensations of pain, pain management and mental health. This is an area insufficiently explored within psychology outside of the CBT and Hypno-CBT6 arena.

An example much closer to the subject discussed in this article, would be the potential value of investigating the intestinal chemical formula, that informs us when and if, a product is good for us, and as such, is it worth pursuing in the future. Products consumed are only good, when they are not poisonous for the system, but also when the situation or the context is favourable, in other words, where and when these are consumed. An example would be, when a serious meat eater goes to a new vegetarian restaurant in town that serves an almost too ‘adventurous’ menu for him. On paper this should be a failed event but the ‘context’ takes over completely and so if the individual is in good company, like a date or with someone he actually likes to spend time with, the affective-response changes to joy and pleasure. Through associated learning, a product becomes even more rewarding, and the experience is more likely to be repeated, if the place where the product was discovered, as well as the company kept at the time, were equally rewarding. Culture, existential and personal values, conditioning and social learning theories, memory and language processing, neuroscience, biology and nutrition, all these research domains come into this one simple social experience, which is repeated by tens of thousands of humans every day. Learning theories only partly explain these social decisions and bonding events because, there is an entire domain of the digestive and sensory system that we haven’t even began to articulate in this paper. The same could be said about the links between the digestion system, memory, and language processing. How we describe linguistically an experience, impacts on how we feel about it!

Developing psychotherapy tools such as NeuroAffective-CBT (NA-CBT), which successfully integrates research from all of above mentioned domains, could pave the way for a fourth-wave7 of evidence-based psychotherapy practices (Mirea, 2012). NA-CBT is a transdiagnostic approach, which means that it does not rely on a psychiatric diagnosis and a prescribed treatment protocol, that integrates successfully nutritional advice, physical strengthening programmes, sleep training, and bloodwork analysis (i.e., the TED model, Mirea 2005/2023) alongside traditional behavioural and cognitive interventions. Similarly, future fourth-wave schools of Integrative-CBT8 would aim to improve self-efficacy and enhance individuals’ ability to listen to their bodies, essential skills that claim control over immunity and health overall.

No longer separating the mind from the body in at least, some of the research, might be an obvious step in the right direction.  And, perhaps accepting the inevitable – the practice of positive, evidence-based psychology, may be in total contradiction with what we are taught by society that we need, in order to be high achieving and forward moving in life. Modern culture is about learning to override the signals from the body though it seems, at least some of the time, the exact opposite is what humans need. Learning to listen to the signals from the body might be the one of the keys that open the door to healthier living.

Glossary:

1The Mind, or the conscious mind, these terms simplistically refer to higher structures of the brain including the prefrontal cortex (PFC), the section of the brain located behind the forehead; this particular area may be responsible for decision making and finding solutions.

2Felt-Sense, Gut-Sense, Gut-Feelings are senses which act as reminders of previous experiences, designed to alert us of a potential reward or indeed, a threat. These terms are used interchangeably through the paper.

3DRBs: abbreviation for Deeply-Rooted Beliefs. DRBs could be defined as the dialectical expression of (internally experienced) felt-senses, which are translated linguistically later in life when language becomes available, those could in fact, be (verbally) expressed as late as adulthood, often during therapy for the first time. DRBs forge a rigid identity within individuals at an earlier stage in their lives and therefore are harder to modify outside of the therapeutic environment, evidence against DRBs is disregarded through mechanisms like mental filters, described in detail in this paper.

4Patient or Client are the same terms, used interchangeably through the article, usually depends on the situational context or where the therapist is likely to have a practice, at times we refer to our clients as patients or vice-versa.

5Integumentary system refers to the human skin and its structures, the other largest human organ, besides the human gut, which makes up to 16% of the body weight, and also interacts with the external world and further communicates with different parts of the nervous system constantly and autonomously.  

6Hypno-CBT – Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy, a transdiagnostic third-wave CBT approach introduced by Donald Robertson and further developed by Mark Davis. Training in Hypno-CBT is offered online and can be accessed here.

7Fourth-wave CBT or the fourth-wave of evidence-based psychotherapy practice refers to the stages of development within the field of evidence-based psychology, CBT in particular. First-wave is marked by extensive behavioural research, this is the foundation of CBT essentially; second-wave brings together research from cognitive psychology and behaviourism; third-wave introduces philosophy and emotional-regulation; fourth-wave is likely to bring along more digital interventions, neuroscience, neurobiology and physiology. For instance, having routinely a blood-test before psychotherapy starts could be considered good practice – since a blood test would point towards physical conditions that have mental health symptoms, like pre-diabetes (Mirea, 2023).  

8Integrative-CBT, on short I-CBT was mentioned for the first time at the 9th International Congress of Cognitive Therapy in Transylvania in 2017 @Babes-Bolyai University, event which brought together more than 400 researchers and clinicians from all over the world, event was hosted by Prof. Daniel David, Beck J, Clark D, Hays S and, other renowned clinicians. 

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Acknowledgements:

This article could not have been finished without valuable guidance and input from Dr Donald Meichenbaum. Dr Meichenbaum is considered by most the ‘Freud of CBT’, one of the three main pioneers, alongside Aaron T Beck and Albert Ellis, of early cognitive and behavioural therapies. Dr Meichenbaum subsequently played an instrumental role in understanding violent trauma, aggressive behaviours, and human resilience.

Editing by Dr D Meichenbaum, SIT and CBT founder; proof reading by Ana Ghetu psychosocial researcher and Dr S Reilly clinical researcher and general practitioner.